Monday, June 7, 2010

True Feelings Revealed

I'm not sure where the words are going to come from to express a recent experience I've had. I have to try to keep things as generic as possible. If you knew the specifics, you would understand why.

Someone who has known me for over 21 years revealed their dislike for me. Their colors were shining bright and true.  We were in the same room, and it just came out. No filter....What's the point in that besides hurting me? As I retreated away, the person came on the attack getting louder and getting closer. I don't know how to deal with things like that. I'm not into confrontation. All I could do was smile and give a stare down. I sit here with my mind full of things to say to this person now...hindsight is always 20/20.  The only thing expressing myself would serve to do is to sever a relationship that is not mine to sever.  I like to surround myself with positive people.  People who benefit me as much as I benefit them.  I don't have the time or the desire to be involved in a relationship like that; too much drama, but it is not mine to change. 

I think it is sad that someone could harbor those feelings for 21 years.  Our relationship was all a lie.  I think the sole purpose was to bring me unhappiness because I am a happy person.  Really, I pity you.  You who despises me.  I have forgiven you.  It is true.  I am that way.  Just because I have forgiven you doesn't mean I can trust you.  And, believe me, if it happens again, I won't hold my tongue there is no way in h - e - double hockey sticks that I'm going to let you chew me up and spit me out for a second time.


  1. Man, that really sucks. I am often surprised by people, and usually, not in a good way.

  2. Holy cow! How surreal for you. I can't understand people like that, but good for you for taking the high ground.

  3. That stinks. 21 years is a long time! I'm your newest follower from the blog hop!

  4. I'm so sorry Lisa. I can't imagine being confronted by such a bizarre and hurtful situation. I hope that you can distance yourself from this person as much as possible.

  5. Sorry. What an interesting experience, to now look back at all those years through a different perspective. Maybe this person has developed a mental illness that would cause them to behave that way. Or maybe you are right and they are just trying to break you down.

    Forgiveness is an amazing thing because it enables us not to carry around the bitterness of others.

    I hope you have a good week!@

  6. I am TERRIFIED of Sharks. TERRIFIED. and here I am reading my blogger reader, BAM - you post a pic of a shark. I had to cover the pic up just to get over here to post a comment. My heart is racing, I will take a deep breath, SLOWLY scroll up and read.....

    Aww....bummer that people can be so mean. Just keep the positive ones near ya!!

  7. wow, that's no fun Lisa! It is so awful to find that not everyone likes you. But you have to let it go, no choice but to walk away & try to be civil & kind next time your paths cross. Bummer, but part of life.

  8. That person is just a bitter, mean person and did that completely to hurt you. Sounds like it is all about them and not about you at all. I hope you can try to forget it even happened.

  9. At a recent stake conference, a talk was given about forgiveness and how we can learn to forgive someone who has hurt us but the trust factor is what is most hard to get back.

    My dearest friend has been on the receiving end of a few very mean people (and they were CHURCH people! which is an added dissapointment, cause what the heck are we going to all of these meetings for if we can't absorb the information we're hearing!)

    There was an anonomys letter involved...and basically, it stems down to jealousy.

    The fact that you knew this person for so long makes it an added blow...I'm sorry that you've had to deal with this...people can be so cruel...


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