Tuesday, March 20, 2012

An Introvert in an Extrovert World

I am admittedly and unashamedly an introvert.  But, I live in an extrovert world.  I would most prefer to stay home with my family or curl up with a good book as opposed to attending some kind of social outing.  I am analytical.  I weigh all  the odds before making any decisions.  The idea of public speaking makes my skin crawl or even answering the phone sometimes leaves me queasy.  But I married an extrovert.  He is loud and talkative in a social setting and he LOVES to visit with people and is NEVER afraid to speak his mind.  But, this is good for me, because it gets me out of my shell.  But, gosh dang it, IT IS HARD!   Sometimes I feel covered in a shroud of fear.  I don't think he always understands the depth of my loathing of social occasions.

When I was in high school, my boyfriend was an extrovert.  He could stop and talk with anyone, he could remember names, faces and experiences as he struck up a conversation.  Me, I was the quite, shy girlfriend who just stood there beside him.  My best friend in high school was definitely an extrovert.  She was fun loving, silly, giggly, often referred to as bubbly, and she just had that engaging personality that drew me to her side like a magnet.

So apparently, as an introvert, I am attracted to extroverts.  They are fun to be around and drag me out of of my comfort zone.  But here is the question...What does an extrovert have to gain from a relationship with an  introvert?   What do I have to offer?  I'm 42 years old and still trying to figure that one out...


  1. As a fellow introvert I feel that extroverts and introverts can balance each other out. The intro can help the extro learn how to be introspective, think before saying/acting, how to breathe and take in the moment every once in awhile, and to appreciate the small simple things in life. An extro can challenge the intros to step out of their comfort zone, let loose sometimes, not to analyze so much, and to be spontaneous. There needs to be more education out there about the introverts since we are the minority (25% of the population) so that we can understand each other and accept each others differences. That is why I like to teach it in my classes. The students seem to have "ah ha" moments especially introverts. They finally realize that there isn't anything wrong with them!

  2. I hear ya sister! I am the same, and my husband is loud!! His family is loud! But, it is a good balance. It seems to work well for us! :)

  3. They give you balance! That is great.


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